4. An-Nisaa

For you half of what your wives leave, if they have no children. Inheritance and worthiness to receive it are established either by means of a cause or by way of a lineage. The cause is marriage and the lineage is kinship. Marriage is the cause of love, as God says, “He placed between you love and mercy” [30:21]. Lineage is assistance and strength, as has come in the report: “A man is many through his brothers.” When one of the relatives by lineage or one of the near ones by cause dies, that will be a wound on a person's heart and a pain in his spirit. The Lord of the Worlds places balm on the pain. After this suffering He commands consolation through the wealth of the person who passed away. Thus, just as pain came from his passing, so also balm comes from his wealth. This is the custom of the Lord with His friends: If He places suffering on them by prescribing the Law, after the suffering He makes a treasure appear with the attribute of alleviation. Shaykh al-Islām Anṣārī said, “How should I have known that suffering is the mother of happi- ness and that beneath one disappointment lie a thousand treasures? How should I have known that hope is the courier of union and that beneath the cloud of munificence despair is impossible? How should I have known that the Lovingly Kind is so forbearing that His gentleness and loving kind- ness to the sinner are beyond reckoning? How should I have known how servant-caressing is the Possessor of Majesty and how much joy His friends have in Him? How should I have known that what I seek is in the midst of the spirit, and that the exaltation of union with Him is my opening?” In my whole life one night at the time of dawn, the image of that comfort of the spirit came to me And asked, “How are you, wounded one?” I said, “In my passion for You, that is the first opening.”

It is for God to turn only toward those who do the ugly in ignorance and then soon turn. Those-God will turn toward them. And God is knowing, wise. Turning/repentance [tawba] is the mark of the road, the leader to the court, the key to the treasure, the intercessor of union, the head of every happiness, and the basis of freedom. First is regret in the heart, second apology with the tongue, and then cutting off from bad things and bad people. It has come in the report that when someone repents but does not put aside bad friends, he is not a repenter. When someone repents but does not put aside food and drink, he is not a repenter. When someone repents but does not put aside his bedclothes and empty his eyes of sleep, he is not a repenter. When someone repents but does not expend the wealth left over after food, he is not a repenter. The precondition of repentance is that you detach your heart from all existent things and turn it toward the Real. You discipline all the blood and flesh in your seven bodily members. Repentance is the precursor of the fire that comes from the bottom of hell so that today you will do to yourself with the water of your eyes what will be done to you tomorrow by the fire. Repentance is a mes- sage sent to you from the Presence: “O chevalier! How long will you make war? How long will you break the covenant? Come back, make peace! “O falcon taken to the sky, come back, don't go! My fingers hold the end of your thread! “O free man! How long have you been asleep? Wake up, it's morning, and you are thirsty for the wine of yearning. Look, it's time for the morning draft! How long will your heart and covenant stay broken? It is time to accept advice and to repent sincerely.”

This turning will not belong to those who keep on doing ugly deeds until death is present for one of them, and then he says: “Surely now I have turned.” In the tongue of learning, one must repent before death, even if it be one moment. In the tongue of practice, one must repent before the soul has the habit of seeing itself and worshiping itself. When someone is pleased with himself and gazes upon himself habitually, the door to repentance has been shut to him and the water of deliverance taken away from him. Quit being the companion of self-nurturing habit-worshipers! Kiss the dust beneath the feet of those who have disowned self! [DS 972] Not everyone who has repented in the road of the Shariah, thereby reaching pardon and forgive- ness, has reached truthfulness in love in respect of the Haqiqah. For a long time David the prophet wept and pleaded. At last it was said to him, “O David! Why do you weep when I have forgiven you, made your adversaries content, and accepted your repentance?” He said, “Lord God, I know, but give me back those sweet moments I had in Your companion- ship and those breaths I had with You in seclusion!” He said, “David, take heed! That is a love that has passed.” From now on leave the way open for the eyes to weep for the days of limpidness have no way to return. * Oh pain, Oh regret-of that standing and sitting in prayer I have dust on the head and wind in the hand.

O you who have faith, it is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will, neither debar them from marriage that you may go off with part of what you have given them, unless they commit a flagrant indecency. Consort with them honorably. For, if you are averse to them, it may be that you are averse to something within which God has placed much good. This is a call, an admonishment, an allusion, a bearing witness, and a ruling. O is the call, you is the admonishment, who is the allusion, have faith is the bearing witness. It is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will is the ruling. The explanation of the ruling is that women are considered weak, and they are imprisoned beneath your severity. Beware of tormenting them, and do not rule over them by way of scheming and deceit. Do not be severe, and do not ask of them what the Shariah does not approve. On the contrary, live with them honorably. Consort with them honorably, that is, with the teachings of the religion and by modeling one's courtesy on the character traits of the submitted.3 Show them the road of the religion and religios- ity and teach them the courteous acts of being a Muslim and the Shariah. And protect them from the Fire, as He says in another place: “Shield yourselves and your families from a fire” [66:6]. Preserve the courteous acts of companionship when consorting with them and tolerate suffering from them, but do not place on them the burden of your service, making them suffer for you. Although outwardly and specifically He is talking about women, by way of allusion He is talking generally about all Muslims. He is saying, “Watch out so that you never see yourself as having a mandatory rightful due from, or an excellence over, any other Muslim. Do not ask those above you to serve you, and do not push yourself on those beneath you. Do not use force against the folk of weakness, but rather strive to show consideration and give comfort to them and seek proximity to them.” Revelation came to David: “O David, if you see someone broken in My road, or someone whose heart has been lost in My work, take care to serve him. With a bit of bread, or a drink of water, seek proximity to him and sit next to the sun of his heart's light. O David, the heart of that pain-stricken poor man is the rising place of My light's sun. The sun of My majesty's light is al- ways shining in the chamber of his heart.” The Pir of the Tariqah said, “O miserable man! If you cannot seek proximity to Him, at least seek proximity to the hearts of His friends, for He gazes down on their hearts. Whomsoever He sees in their hearts, He takes as His friend.” Do you not see how MuṣṬafā used to sit with the weak among the Emigrants, considering him- self one of them? He used to say, “Praise belongs to God who placed in my community those with whom He commanded me to make myself patient.” That is in the hadith of Abū Saʿīd al-Khudarī, who said, “I was with a group among whom were the weak among the Emigrants, and some were curtaining the nakedness of others. A reciter was reciting the Qur'an for us and we were listening to his recitation. The Prophet came and stood over us, and when the reciter …

If you desire to exchange a wife in place of another... This is the realization of generosity in the religion of friendship and the smoothing of the founda- tion of chivalry. He is saying, “Do not join the cruelty of separation with taking back livelihood, for this is not the work of the generous and it is unworthy of the chevaliers! You have put the scar of separation in the poor woman's heart, so do not cut off the hand of her expenditures! If you take back what you gave, you will place a scar on her scar.” Ḥasan ibn ʿAlī had a wife whom he divorced, and then he sent her plentiful wealth. He said about her, “The tribulation of our separation is enough. I must not put upon her the suffering of neediness as well.” They say the wealth was 40,000 dirhams. The woman dumped that wealth on the ground and said, “Paltry goods from a departed lover!”